Well, hello there. Yes, I’m still around. Getting worried?

One reason why I haven’t been posting here of late is that us that I’m trying to complete this Hemingway project sooner rather than later. Most recently I have been posting ‘essays’ and bits and pieces I already more or less completed on the website I’ve created for it. If anyone wants to take a look, it’s slowly coming together.

I’ve got loads more to post on the site, but it all needs to be read again and re-written as I do repeat myself a lot, and much of that repetition is not very relevant to the particular topic of the ‘essay’. Suggestions of any kind are very welcome, though that’s a tad forlorn request as such request are always ignored. Why I can’t think. Time

and again I’ve plugged, plugged, plugged the only novel I have written so far (and don’t be out off by the cover, left, — that’s part of it and it isn’t quite as straightforward as it might seem) and a book of short stories (below left) but has anyone bothered to buy a copy (and all you pay is the production cost, for Lord’s sake)? Have they hell.

As it happens I’m not at all put out because at my late age (it was my birthday yesterday, and I’ll not see 30 again) I expected nothing more form people. As someone once pointed out ‘the great thing about being terminally cynical is that you are never disappointed’.

But I do want to get this Hemingway bollocks out of the way, simply because I want to get on with something else and it hangs over me to such and extent that if I spend part of the day not reading or writing about the old fraud, I feel vaguely guilty, the sort of guilt you feel when you take a sickie and just can’t enjoy the buckshee time off. Well, I couldn’t anyway.

What else is new? The covid stuff is getting a little long in the tooth, about time we had a new crisis. This one has outstayed its welcome, and the public are remarkably fickle about such matters. Sad to say our

crises are like fashion: they go out of date very quickly. Remember Aids and how we ‘were all going to die’ (that memorable headline in the then Daily Mirror which cleverly did not claim we would all ‘die of Aids’, and so was on to a winner — we are all going to die. 

As for covid, it’s really getting impossible to know what to believe. My view is that it is better to be safe than sorry, but that doesn’t necessarily mean the doomsters are all correct in their assessment. Then there’s the mystery about why some groups are more at risk than others: black and Asians (who make up a substantial proportion of our British national health service staff are said to be particularly at risk. Young children on the other hand — are told — are not. Also very confusing is just how much at risk of dying we are if we contract it, why some people who have the virus are asymptomatic, and on and on.

I have been amusing myself arguing the toss with various state-registered idiots in the Daily Telegraph comments section, the vast majority of whom are convinced ‘it’s all a hoax’ and a plot to ‘rob us of our freedoms’. When asked directly just why a government — pretty much all governments around the world — seem to be so keen of ‘robbing us of our freedoms’ answers come none. One idiot I was ‘debating with’ — I was debating, he was slagging me off — insisted it is all just a scam for politicians to ‘make money’. It doesn’t help on that score that, at least here in Britain, public funds have been badly spent on personal protective equipment (PPE).

But anyway, time for the rugby or football. I can’t make up my mind whether to watch France hammer the Scots in the ‘Autumn Nations Cup’ (on now, France already 3-0 up) or watch Leicester and Liverpool try to get the better of each other. Decisions, decisions . . .

Now take a quick look at the Hemingway site and tell me whether it is shite or shite.

Mainly for Anonymous (but others are just as welcome as long as you wipe your feet on the way in and keep your hands off the spoons)

This is appearing on my ‘private’ blog, but I gather it isn’t quite as private as I thought. So what they hell. This entry is specifically for Anonymous who kindly left a comment on August 26 earlier this year.

Thank you for your comment. Things still not brilliant between myself and my wife. Believe it or not one of the main things which bothers me is (a la JC's 'look to the beam in your own eye' etc and though I'm a signed up atheist, it is good advice all-round) is how much I might be two blame. Who knows?

We rarely see ourselves in true focus, either pitching ourselves too high or too low. At the risk of being laughed at (by you) for quoting a song, there's a good one by Leon Russell called Magic Mirror, and about a year ago I set it to images and posted it on YouTube.

It was just by chance that I came across your comment (and thank you for it, it's cheering to know that something you've written has at least been read) so please forgive the delay. These last few days have been a particular piss-off for one reason or another, but it would bore you to go into details. However, I keep reminding myself that in the grand scheme of things, I am better off than many. I won't have to give you examples as I'm sure you can come up with your own.

As for Hemingway, he has gone on the back-burner these past few weeks: my stepmother died in July and I was tied up doing all sorts, registering death etc, organising her funeral. I have inherited her cottage (which might reinforce my admission that I am most certainly not as deep in the shit as many when you think of all those living in crap conditions or who are homeless) and I have spent at least a month clearing it out so that my daughter can move in with her husband and two-year-old - they have been living with his parents for the past four years, not renting as they could to save up for a house of their own. I'm letting her live there for £1 a year, plus paying their own bills.

But I have a lot more written about Hemingway than has so far appeared on the website. In fact if you are interested and wouldn't mind doing me a favour, I can post pdfs of what I have so far written for you to read and comment (and ‘I don’t think this bit works’ or ‘this bit is confusing’ is 1,000 more useful to me than ‘I think this is brilliant!’). If you were interested it would not take long for me to post them as I have so far posted a reviews and commentaries I’ve come across and used. If you are interested, leave another comment or email me.

By the way, what’s your name. It might be ‘Barry’ (a friend who sometimes reads my main blog) or it could be someone entirely different.

Take care, P.

More or less just a placeholder (but with benefits — a piccy of morons with lethal rifles and less sense than a broken brick)

I promised myself I would try to post here more regularly, but that was an empty pledge, the alternative word for ‘promise’ in newspaper circles used here because, in newspaper circles we didn’t like using the same word twice in close proximity.

Astute readers will notice that I have already used the words ‘newspaper’ and ‘circles’ three times overall (including just now), so they might wonder why I am not bending over backwards to find alternative words for ‘newspaper’ and ‘circles’ (four). Well, I’ll tell you why: if I did, I would not have been able to make the cheap and silly joke I’ve just made (i.e. using the words ‘newspaper’ and ‘circles’ (five) several times in contradiction to my revelation that in ‘newspaper’ ‘circles’ (six) the practice is abhorred. I’m glad we’ve cleared that up.

The fact is that I’ve been busy, busy enough even to put my ‘Hemingway project’ on the back burner for now (which might not be such a bad thing: eventually I intend to have one long spurt of writing and get it done sooner rather than later because I want to get on with other things. And having a break might freshen me up a little, and there isn’t really that much to do).

In the past, I think I’ve mentioned my stepmother, possibly not in quite adulatory terms (her affair with father, begun 17 years before my mother died caused some unhappiness in our family). She had a severe stroke over 13 years ago and has been disabled since then. She had two more less severe strokes a few years ago and more recently doctors discovered she was growing a small tumour on her brain. Well, she died at the end of July and we buried her at the beginning of August.

More to the point I inherited her granite Cornish cottage, just down the road from where I live, and for many weeks now I’ve been clearing it out. And boy was there a lot to clear out. I’ve pretty much done it all now, but it still needs to be thoroughly cleaned.

It was in no way ‘dirty’, it’s just that when you get rid of a lot of stuff you uncover corners which have been left unattended for years and where grime has accumulated. NB ‘Grime’ is not quite as distressing as ‘filth’ — ‘filth’ is horrible, ‘grime’ is simply unpleasant. Once it has been cleaned, it could well do with redecorating. The last decorating it had was in the early Eighties after my mother died and my father married my stepmother.

So there you have it: my excuse for not pontificating here as regularly as I believe I promised I would.

. . .

I find that I can sort out my own thoughts better when in conversation or when writing them down rather than thinking. In fact, I’ve quite bad I conscious rational thinking. My mind wanders a great deal — I was a hell of a day-dreamer when I was younger, in fact, I probably still am one, though no longer young. There was one question which I do want to examine: the attitude of men of my generation and perhaps the one younger towards women. It is such a large topic that I shan’t launch into it here, but I shall say that I have become aware of several things, none of which are unknown.

The first is that as children and young adults we seem to ‘absorb’ attitudes. These are rarely ‘taught’ directly, but we acquire them by some kind of social osmosis. And one such attitude — which, let me be very clear from the start I wholly abhor and completely reject — is that the women are somehow inferior, at a level beneath men and all that entails.

I suspect in my case it was made even more pernicious in that I was raised as a practising Roman Catholic — ‘strict’ might give the wrong impression, but it was certainly the full fun show: mass every Sunday, regular confession and taking communion, attending RC schools etc. And very unfortunately — even more unfortunately for women — the RC church has a thoroughly misogynistic attitude to women, which pretty much permeates every aspect of an RC’s life. The trouble is that at an intellectual level I will believe one thing but those deep, deep, deep attitude still linger in my bones. Here’s an example: I might hear a professor, a businesswoman, an ambassador or some such on the radio, and invariably I catch myself thinking ‘well, hasn’t she done well for herself!’

The obvious implication is that ‘she’s “just” a woman so really, well done!’ And if that irritates any woman reading this, believe me it irritates me ten, twenty, one hundred times as much. Certainly, I can rationalise it and — as I’ve pointed out above — assure myself it’s just an echo of a period of RC ‘brainwashing’, and that, crucially, that is wholly opposed to how I think now and what I believe. But . . .

That is one topic I’ve promised myself I’d like to look at at length and to into a lot deeper. As I say I find I can ‘think’ more clearly when I write.

. . .

Another thing which has been preoccupying me, but which I’m sure I’ve posted on before is ‘the seemingly global rise of the Right’. And I suspect that Trump and his moronic stupidity are not, as many seem to think, a cause but a symptom of something far more deep-rooted and egregious. For example, the central concern on Trump — memorably described by his then Secretary of State Rex Tillerson as ‘a fucking moron’ after he and others had tried for hours and failed to get Trump to comprehend the importance of diplomacy in foreign affairs — is not the man himself but the size of the number who support him.

Many are men (and, I supposed women) who are quite prepared to go out on to the streets carrying heavy and lethal weapons and armoury and make it clear they would not be adverse to using it. Quite why carrying a large,

 

semi-automatic rifle is thought necessary when you take part in a protest against covid-19 lockdown regulations is beyond my comprehension and you’ll have to ask those who do so. But whatever their reasons, it is not encouraging.

That is especially true given the coming, though not yet arrived global economic slump which will have been caused by the covid-19 epidemic. Most people are friends in good times and when the sun shines, but when it gets distinctly colder and resources become scarce the temptation to think ‘every man and woman for themselves’ grows large. And if, as is not at all impossible the Western world experiences a period of unemployment like that of the Thirties Great Depression, it is even more dangerous that many men (and women) will have time on their hands and have become accustomed to carrying a semi-automatic rifle to make their various points.

I can’t write a great deal on that topic because I have nothing original to say (Do you ever? — Ed) and at this point it would be nothing but speculation. In three weeks, when the US elect their next president, we’ll either know how bad it might get or that our fears were a little groundless.

Pip, pip!

To be honest, I’m too knackered to try to think up some clever-clever ‘isn’t he such a smart cookie’ title, so this will have to do. If you’re really interested, you can regard it as a ‘companion piece’ to my ‘entry’ on art a few weeks ago. If you’re not really interested, what the hell, just read this anyway

I was getting one with this Hemingway bollocks when I decided, for one reason or another to post it here as my latest blog entry. (Note to foreign readers i.e. non-British readers: ‘bollocks’ is a semi-technical term we use in the production of newspapers to indicate ‘the matter in hand’, ‘the latest piece of turgid shite from our star columnist who in a more honest world wouldn’t be paid in washers’, ‘this crap’ etc. It is a word extensively used by working sub-editors/copy editors.) For one thing I haven’t been posting as regularly as I once was. For another, it struck me as a possibly useful companion piece to the entry on art. But, hell, whatever...

There is a notable tendency most of us share which is obliquely pertinent to the prominence Hemingway achieved in the literary world in his lifetime and still broadly retains. The tendency is this: many, if not most, of us, are generally quite prepared, often almost eager, to forgive and perhaps even to justify the flaws and shortcomings in those (or that) to which we are generally well-disposed. We are ‘on their side’ and we will gladly cut them a little slack.

Conversely, if for whatever reason we have taken against someone or something, we are only too pleased to pick up on, highlight and condemn each and every flaw and shortcoming, however slight. And here, being one of the minority who are not persuaded by Hemingway’s ‘genius’ and, furthermore, puzzled as to why anyone can be, I am willing to admit that I might well be guilty of nit-picking for fault.

A similar, though certainly not the same, tendency is often at play in ‘the arts’, although unlike in our private lives, it is not driven by personal bias but by something at once both more complex and remarkably simple.

If after reading the latest ‘innovative’ and ‘ground-breaking’ novel, hearing an ultra-modern piece of music or visiting an exhibition of ‘subversive’ art, and despite being assured it is a work of genius, privately we remain unconvinced, it is a brave woman or man who will publicly announce their doubts: but it is not necessarily doubt in our own judgment which causes our reticence. 

It is more likely to be a fear of looking ridiculous: who are we to judge on the worth of a piece when the great and good in the arts have given it their blessings?

Rather than risk the scorn of our peers, we might decide to ignore those aspects of a ‘new’ work with which we feel uncomfortable and cut it a little slack. We might try to assure ourselves that such a new, unusual and ground-breaking piece ‘needs space’ and being new, unusual and ground-breaking can be judged only by new rules.

In a bout of modesty we might even tell ourselves it is no doubt our own fault that we are not immediately able to acknowledge its excellence: look at Picasso and Stravinsky or, in earlier years, the Impressionists, we might tell ourselves, and how the world had to learn to appreciate the art they produced; how we all had to discover ‘new ways of reading’, ‘new ways of looking’ and ‘new ways of listening’.

Read this:

‘In the morning it was bright and they were sprinkling the streets of the town, and we all had breakfast in a café. Bayonne is a nice town. It is like a very clean Spanish town and it is on a big river. Already, so early in the morning, it was very hot on the bridge across the river. We walked out on the bridge and then took a walk through the town.’ 

Were that rather flat, not to say banal, passage (the first paragraph of chapter 10 of The Sun Also Rises) not the work of a writer hitherto hailed as ‘a great writer’, but merely an excerpt from the travel diary of Rockbridge, Illinois’s Lewis Monroe, I suspect the kudos would be in shorter supply. But as it’s Hemingway, he of the ‘lean, hard and athletic narrative prose’ that ‘puts more literary English to shame’ (as a contemporary New York Times review of The Sun Also Rises, has it), so . . .

Flat, banal? Rubbish! Hemingway? He’s a great writer, isn’t he? Nobel Prize laureate, leading modernist, one of America’s best novelist, an original voice . . . How could a man like Hemingway be thought even capable of writing flat, banal passages? Get a grip man! Oh, you’re not an academic, or a fellow published writer, or a professional literary critic? Ah, well, that explains it, doesn’t it? Now, fuck off and don’t waste our time!

It is, in fact by Hemingway (he of the ‘lean, hard and athletic narrative prose’), but had I, in fact, accomplished a double bluff and, after persuading you beyond any doubt that the piece is a passage from Hemingway’s masterful pen, then come clean and revealed that in fact this is from the travel diary of Lewis Monroe, of Rockbridge, Illinois, composed while he and a few pals, would it still be a piece of masterful writing?

Or would it — on reflection (‘well, of course, it’s obvious, isn’t it?’) — revert to being flat and banal? I believe it might well do so. I have no truck with the ‘transubstantiation’ of Roman Catholic ideology, and I similarly have not truck with any other kind of suggested transubstantiation.

Is a piece of loo paper suddenly valuable because it has been certified that the Epstein (the sculptor Jacob, not The Beatles’ manager Brian) used it to wipe his arse? No, doubt, though some clever shyster would have no trouble drumming up some schmuck willing to part with $1,000 for it. Put it in an ivory frame and you can double the price.

. . .

There are certainly those those throughout the world who are passionate about literature and ‘the arts’ (and, given half the chance, will explain to you at length just why and why they simply could not live without the arts), but in the grubbier corners of the arts world, less lofty, more commercial imperatives come into play.

A great many people make a great deal of money from selling ‘the arts’ in one way or another, and those involved in making it – publishing houses, film and recording studios, auction houses, concert promoters, upscale galleries and dealers of every stripe — are naturally ever keen to talk up the value of the merchandise they are pushing — for when all is said and done ‘merchandise’ is what it is, whether ‘it’ is a rare first edition, a napkin some famous jerk painter doodled on to settle a restaurant bill are that piece of used loo paper you have just bought for $1,000. By the way, if you think I am being unnecessarily scatological, check out Gilbert and George’s Naked Shit Pictures.

What’s good enough for Gilbert and George is certainly good enough for me, though I should point out the Gilbert and George are Turner Prize winners, have several honorary doctorates and three years ago were elected to London’s Royal Academy of Arts. On the other hand, I’m not, I’m just a knob with a loud mouth who likes writing and getting pissed on tawny port.

If a writer, painter or composer ‘has a name’ and is ‘selling’, those with a stake in maximising the profits to be made from that person’s output will try to ensure she or he continues to sell; and thus they have a vested interest in talking up her or his significance in their given field and downplaying any flaws or shortcomings that might be apparent to some. To do that they will to some extent rely on the arts’ industry’s camp followers — the film, theatre and art critics and book reviewers all of whom function as influencers and are an intricate element of the arts industry.

The upshot is that the ‘consumer’ — many might consider using that word in the context of ‘the arts’ vulgar, but to be frank there is none better — can often find it difficult to gauge the worth of a ‘work of art’, especially if the work is unusual and they are assured it is ‘fresh’ or ‘innovative’ or ‘ground-breaking’. So when the rest of the world is lauding to high heaven a new novel or film, a piece of music, play or exhibition, most of us are quite prepared to go with the flow and accept the judgment of those we assume know what they are talking about.

. . .

The world has always demanded new darlings and celebrated them accordingly, and Hemingway was by no means the first when In Our Time, his first book of short stories, was published in 1926. Some are still remembered, many more have been forgotten, at least by the reading public if not by academia, as each younger generation enthusiastically espouses the latest fashion in the arts as they espouse the latest fashion in clothes. And will always regard those who question their judgment and championing of their new darlings as, at best, stuffy, uncool and old-fashioned, at worst wilfully contrary or just mad.

Unlike me, you might well believe Ernest Hemingway really was a ‘writer of genius’, but you might also agree he and his career benefited enormously from the commercial imperatives which dictated Scribner’s decision to publish The Sun Also Rises. Idealists might care to believe the house had the purest motives at heart and by choosing to publish Hemingway’s work was simply concerned with furthering ‘literature’. What is, though, undeniable is that under that guidance of Hemingway’s editor Maxwell Perkins, the publication of The Sun Also Rises was first and foremost a business venture.

Perkins, one of the young Turks of the publishing world who had begun his career at Scribner’s in its advertising department and knew a thing or two about the business side of publishing, also wanted to ensure Scribner’s did not lose market share and would be seen as a house equally as interested in avant-garde work.

Hemingway’s literary prominence and certainly his reputation have, admittedly, declined a little since their zenith, not least because over the past century many other darlings have arrived to be championed (and sold). But with the publication of The Sun Also Rises in 1927 and on the back of In Our Time, Hemingway became, in more modern parlance, an overnight sensation, and this was thanks to very astute marketing by Scribner’s, and sales of the novel were astonishing. According to Ms Blume in a piece she wrote for Vanity Fair

‘ . . . thanks to [Scribner’s] public-relations machine that plugged [Hemingway] as a personality along with his breakthrough novel, which would sell 19,000 copies within the first six months of its publication. (By the time of Hemingway’s death, in 1961, an estimated one million copies had been sold.)’

Scribner’s marketing department know its job. Ms Blume continues that those

‘charged with marketing Hemingway’s work were aware of their good fortune: in a sense, they were getting two juicy stories for the price of one. It quickly became apparent that the public’s appetite for Hemingway was as great as that for his writing. Here was a new breed of writer — brainy yet brawny, a far cry from Proust and his dusty, sequestered ilk, or even the dandyish Fitzgerald’.

She observes that

‘The Sun Also Rises became the guidebook to youth culture. Parisian cafés teemed with Hemingway-inspired poseurs: the hard-drinking Jake Barnes and the studiously blasé Lady Brett Ashley became role models. The reason this pioneering youth movement still shimmers with dissipated glamour has a lot to do with The Sun Also Rises’

. . .

I might be an apostate on the matter of Hemingway’s ‘genius’, but even I won’t deny that among his peers his style was distinctive, although whether being ‘distinctive’ is necessarily praiseworthy is a moot point. It was certainly an aspect of his work which Scribner’s marketing department highlighted in its campaign to launch the writer as a sensation: here was something ‘new’ and ‘fresh’, the publishers stressed, a style and attitude that was very different to that of the old-school writers.

Scribner’s was, though, obliged to tread carefully: among its other authors were both Henry James and Edith Wharton, two of the ‘old-school’ writers Hemingway was touted to be leaving behind and whose ‘more literary’ styles, according to that rather overwrought New York Times reviewer, his own put to shame. Although James had died several years before Hemingway’s rise to fame, Wharton was still alive (and was even nominated for the Nobel Prize in 1927, 1928 and 1930). The work of both writers was still selling so well that some senior Scribner’s partners were discomfited by the tactics of Hemingway’s editor Max Perkins and had to be won over.

There is more to ‘writing’ than just prose style, but here, too, I suggest, Hemingway comes more than a little unstuck and proves to be less than the full deal. He long, and inexplicably, insisted that The Sun Also Rises was not an autobiographical novel. Strictly speaking it isn’t, much of the novel was exactly that, especially to the friends and acquaintances who accompanied him on his third trip to Pamplona and who with barely any attempt to disguise them became the protagonists in his novel. In a piece for Town & Country (about Lady Duff Twysden, Lady Brett Ashley in Hemingway’s novel) Lesley M M Blume observes

‘In the end, The Sun Also Rises was a (barely) fictionalized account of the events that had gone down in Pamplona’.

She adds that Donald Ogden-Stewart (the humorist and later Hollywood screenwriter Donald Ogden-Stewart who, with Hemingway’s childhood friend Bill Smith, was transmuted in the novel into ‘Bill Gorton’ in the novel)

‘. . . was astonished that Hemingway was even passing it off as fiction: it was, in Stewart’s opinion, nothing but a report on what happened … [it was] journalism”.

This is not in itself reprehensible – many authors extrapolate into fiction events from real life. It is what you do with your material which tells, how you transmute it into something greater than what is was before you started. What is baffling is Hemingway’s continued and persistent insistence that his novel was not autobiographical.

I suspect that, as Ms Blume establishes, desperate as he was to become a ‘great writer’ — and to be acknowledged as such — he feared his novel would not be taken seriously if it was seen as according to one reviewer of Ms Blume’s book put it mere ‘gossipy reportage’, even though, uncharitably, at the end of the day in many ways that is all it was despite the high-flown claims made for it as literature.

I’m disappointed. When you tell a joke, it’s a bit of downer when no one laughs. OK, not a joke you know what you mean

About 15 months ago, I came across a very useful website called Deadlines for Writers. And that’s exactly what it is: you are provided with a monthly ‘prompt’, a strict word count and a deadline for a story and a poem (you can accept the challenge for both or either).

Crucially, it’s free. There is no charge as, for example, there is a charge, usually about $20, for entering writing competitions to win a top prize of $3,000 (and far small second and third prizes. OK, you might say, wearing your charitable ‘let’s not get too cynical’ hat: these sites have costs and have to be paid for somehow so a small charge is understandable. And anyway, what’s $20?

Well, on the face of it, yes, but just do the maths (US ‘math’ though why I really don’t know) and you will realise that first and foremost such ‘competitions’ are exceptionally nice little earners for the poor, hopeful schmuck who cough up their $20. But I have written about that before (and you can find the post here) so I won’t do so again.

The point is that Deadlines For Writers does not charge you anything. It does have a higher tier where, for a small fee, you can have your story or poem appraised (by whom I don’t know), but joining at the basis, free level, does me (and it seems many others) fine.

The benefits are learning discipline, pretty much as far as I am concerned the prerequisite for most endeavours, including writing fiction of verse. You have a month to write and revise you piece, but just a 12-hour window so submit. And although the word count is a little flexible, it’s not much.

This month 155 were submitted, which is about the average. Members are from all around the world from every continent, though for some reason women predominate.

Another benefit is that, if you are lucky, others who have submitted stories (this month well read other stories and occasionally make comments. They only do so occasionally, but these comments can sometimes be useful.

I have submitted two stories (I created second identity a few months after joining so I could do so) every month, so the discipline side of it is working. Just how engaging and interesting my stories are I don’t know. And that is cause of my disappointment.

Usually get one or two comments every month and, I don’t mind admitting, I look forward to them. But this month I have had no comment on either one of the stories I submitted.

As you can imagine subject matter and style vary. Most folk, it seems, try their hand at chick-lit, science fiction or fantasy, which are not my bag and I don’t. Also some of the stories (I read a few at random every month

and sometimes leave comments) vary in — how do I say this without coming across as snob? — quality. Of the ones I read some are engaging and interesting, many are not.

Now for the cause of my disappointment: one of the stories I submitted this month was a little different. I attempted a pastiche of the kind of rotund, wordy, often overblown style of the 19th-century. It took the form of a review of a novel by Henry James (he of the rotund, wordy, and as he got older, often overblown style).


I realised it wasn’t quite the kind of stuff most folk choose to submit, but I took care over it, a great deal of care, in fact, to make sure it was not just horribly wordy and overblown, but actually also made complete sense. And I have so far had no comment.

Well, that’s a shame, so here and now I ask any of you reading this, if you have time, to read it and tell me what you think. It’s called Yes, You Mr James! and you can read or download it here.

Pip, Pip

(Or as Henry James, he of the mysterious bicycle/fire hose incident — find out for yourselves — would put it, pip, as it were and indeed, pip.)